Just because there are obstacles in your way doesn't mean you're on the wrong path

For the past 2 months I have been attending a group at my church called ZAO. It is for anyone between the ages of 18 and 29. ZAO means alive, to live, to have life. And I have got to say I have never met a group of people with such life in them. Everyone who attends comes from a different background and when I am with them I don't feel judged at all. We all have our struggles, but we have overcome them and through that we are able to encourage others with the same or similar problems. I started going to the church it is a part of about 3 months ago. My friend Kristal and her brother Daniel (my now boyfriend :) but that's a whole other story) encouraged me to start coming to church on Sunday morning and ZAO Thursday night. Pastor Leonce is over ZAO and he is an amazing speaker. I have never been so encouraged and challenged to be my best. Either my first or second week there PL challenged us to be nice to our enemy. It was our way of celebrating National Hater Day, I think. I knew who it was that I was supposed to be nice to and anyone who knows me well enough can probably guess who it is. I was willing to accept the challenge but I kind of shrugged off the importance of it by the end of the night and didn't think another thing about. When I returned to ZAO the next week and PL mentioned the challenge I realized that without even trying I had accomplished it. My enemy doesn't even know I was nice to them, in fact they know nothing about the whole challenge. I defended this person against someone I love dearly and there was nothing in it for me. I didn't try to be nice, I wasn't even thinking about the challenge, I was just doing what my heart told me was right, and for that I know it was sincere.

July 24th PL challenged us to get rid of the one thing or one person that was standing between us and God for one week. Now this I was not too thrilled about. I knew instantly who that person was for me. He had been my best friend for 4 years and he recently got engaged and I wasn't too happy about it. I cried most of the night, knew it would not be easy but I told God I would give it a try. I told Daniel who I was having to get rid of and I told him that maybe this guy getting engaged was the best thing that ever happened to me. I either called or text him once that week but he didn't respond and it was then that I accepted that this was what God wanted for me. From then on I didn't care that I had just given up someone I had been holding on to for so long. I was giving up the one person I had let give me my purpose, and in doing that I came to grips with the fact that God was the only one who could do that for me. It is what He thinks about me that matters most.

Accepting all of this was still very hard for me but God made it more obvious that it was in my best interest. Last Thursday PL spoke on Mark 10:17-21 where God told the rich young man that he lacked only "one thing." PL asked us to contemplate what our "one thing" was that is keeping us from fully committing to God. For me it was still this guy. For years I had listened to what he said about me and accepted it as the truth. This was a huge night of healing for me and I am thrilled to say I have finally let him go. I do not wish anything bad upon him but I realize that by being his friend I was harming myself, my spirit, and my relationship with God.

And with alot of contemplation I realized that I never would have been able to pursue a relationship with Daniel if I hadn't let go of this other guy. I have been so much happier over the past few weeks. I haven't had this guy dragging me down and I am secure in the assurance that God's opinion of me never changes, I may disappoint him but his love never fails.